Acronyms & Glossary Of Terms
All Been Changed
Usage: When those well laid plans of mice and men all falls to pieces...
Away From Keyboard
Usage: When you have to leave a chat session...
Away From Keyboard Gone For Coffee
Usage: When you have to leave a chat session for the most important of reasons; coffee.
Another One Of Those Days
Usage: When everything starts to go to hell in a handbasket. See also OOTD
Big Red Button Solution
Usage: Similar to 'Have you tried turning it off and on again?', when all else fails BRSS.
Can't Be A***d
Usage: When you just could not be bothered to do something.
Completely Useless B*!#):d
Does That Answer Your Question?
Usage: When somebody asks you for proof you've done something.
Do You Have It/Any
Usage: Mainly for when you are too lazy to type it in a text and you are on the cadge...
Funny Five Minutes
Usage: That short period of time when your brain (or a computer/device) decides to go completely off the tracks before rectifying itself.
Fat pFingers Effect
Fouled Up Beyond All Recognition
Usage: Used when a previously well behaved piece of equipment just goes potty and stops working...
God Bless Google
Usage: They do good s**t, so why not?
'Usage: Unconventional praise.
Getting Stuff Done
Usage: Well pretty self explanatory really...
Have you tried turning off and on again?
USAGE: Do I really have to explain?
Have you wiki'd it?
Usage: You learnt something helpful that you may need to know again, so put it on the wiki.
I Don't Know What That Means
Usage = Ronseal
It Is FUBAR'd?
Usage = Ronseal
Is It Installed Yet?
I Know Right
Usage = Statement of truth
Installs, Moves, Adds and Changes
Usage: What some IT engineers do for a living, goes along with Break/Fix.
I now know what that means
Usage = Ronseal
Insert Sid James Laugh Here
Usage: For when you've read or made a double entendre
Just Flipping Google It
Usage: Before asking someone a question, go to Google; do a search. If you do not understand the answers then ask the question.
Just Flipping Look On eBay
Usage: Before spending time looking for that obscure item all around the internet, first try eBay.
Just The One
Usage: Not two fingers...
Let Me Google That For You
Usage: The reply you give when someone asks you a question they just cannot be asked to find the answer for.
Lots Of Trouble Usually Serious
Usage = Don't even ask because it's going to be bad news.
Alternate = Women
Matters Beyond Our Reasonable Control
Usage: Your broadband service has gone down due to someone stealing copper cabling, the ISP would list this as MBORC.
Monday Morning Mayhem
Usage: The usual s**t that happens to I.T. geeks after the weekend... nothing works and no-one is happy.
New Computer Installation Guide
Never Gets Old
Usage: When you crack the same joke time and again.
Not Safe For Work
On A Different Subject
Usage: Especially good in text/twitter messaging to show change of subject.
Oh God Another Acronym I Have To Remember
Usage: People keep making up more acronyms...
One Of Those Days
Usage: When everything starts to go to hell in a handbasket. See also AOOTD
Problem Exists Between Keyboard And Chair
Usage: When the fault with the system/software/hardware is actually the soft and squidgy thing operating it.
Problem In Chair Not In computer
Usage: See PEBKAC
Read The Flipping Manual
Usage: Before asking someone a question about a bit of software/hardware etc if it came with a manual refer to it. If you do not understand the manual then see JFGI.
Read The Flipping Wiki
Usage: Before spending time looking for an answer (see JFGI) check the company wiki and see if you have already run across the problem and added the solution!
Sounds Like A Plan
Scientific Wild Arsed Guess
Too Flipping New
Usage: Normally uttered after updating software and then finding a previous feature/program no longer performs as normally expected.
Too many Human Interface Devices
Usage: Many used by engineers working on multiple systems on one desk. You start typing away on a keyboard and nothing appears on screen, because its the wrong keyboard for the system you are looking at.
Too Much Like Hard Work
Usage: When something really is not worth the effort.
Taste The Difference. (you know, the Sainsbury's brand)
Time to throw some stuff out.
This open source stuff is claptrap
Usage: When you find another cool feature in a piece of software that you (legally) did not pay for.
Tweet'd, Wiki'd and Blog'd
Usage Post your stuff online and let someone know.
Why Would You Say That
Usage What? No, wait. What?!
Glossary Of Terms
Firmware = Software used by the piece of equipment it is installed in to, i.e. an optical drive has firmware used to run it, but is not accessible by the end user or the operating system.
Hardware = Physical equipment, i.e. keyboard, laptop etc
Software = Programmes used on a computer system, usually installed to a hard drive or flash media
Squidgyware = The human element..... See the acronym PEBKAC and PICNIC